E is for... Evaluating

I think most people would agree with me that New Year’s Resolutions are a bit like verbal contracts – not worth the paper they are written on. So this December I decided instead of making unrealistic plans to, say, stay away from chocolate or go to the gym more, I will make a list of things I have learnt in 2009 and try to remember these lessons in the new year. Of course I will also give the chocolate and gym points some thought, but because I want to, and not because it’s January 1st.

In no particular order, my 2009 musings are:

- Karma is not a myth. I have never much been a believer in the “what goes around, comes around” school of thought, but the past year has begun to change my mind on this. I’m not saying everyone has to check behind them for the big boomerang of fate to come kick them in the ass for that late library book or for scoffing the last Rolo. But I have seen this year, on more than one occasion, that people really do get what is coming to them, good or bad, and just sometimes you can be around to witness it. So, if you’re having a bad time right now, I really think that the balance of the universe will make it up to you somehow, maybe with a big cake, or your best friend landing on your doorstep and making you smile.

- You are not defined by your job title. I’m sad to say much of 2009 was marred by upheaval in my work life. At the beginning of the year I took to the decision to change roles in my team, for what seemed like a promotion and a chance to prove myself. In the end I think that the stress increased and the rewards most certainly did not. Given it was a tough year for any company, it wasn’t surprising that the travel and benefits that I used to enjoy, dried up very quickly. However what was a surprise was that by the middle of the year I had found myself struggling more and more with what I had long thought as my only career choice. I think the best way to describe what happened was as a mental “burnout”. Every day of work got harder, and more painful than an outsider would ever think possible. A change was needed, but accepting this took the best part of the year for me to really understand. No job is worth getting ill over.

So anyway, I went from being a Senior Analyst to being a Sales Assistant, a move that was never on my list of career goals. And yes, the work is very different, and the pay is less, but this doesn’t mean I am any less of a success. Now my mind is free to develop all kinds of ideas that I would never have thought of before, and without the mental burnout, I feel chances of putting these thoughts into action have increased tenfold, this blog being a very good example. And what defines me now is what I am – not what I do.

- Adventures can be found at home. In September, the pilot and I were presented with an opportunity to move to Athens for 6 months. I was so excited that My Adventure had finally arrived, but unfortunately it wasn’t to be, and the whole thing fell through. That was a real bummer, but I’m not giving up on My Adventure yet. Until the next chance to move somewhere fantastic comes along, I’m finding adventures right here at home. I’m horse riding and snow-boarding and climbing mountains, and these are compelling, fantastic and enjoyable things. Little tiny adventures strung together keeping things interesting. There is so much to explore in this beautiful country of ours, I am determined not to be impatient in 2010, I know My Adventure will happen.

- Handmade is best (and not just because Kirsty Alsop tells me so). With the new job, time for indulging in my handmade hobby has been at a premium. I managed to do a pretty nice job decorating my Christmas gifts with ribbon roses, making Christmas decorations and knocked up a few cards, but making stuff is very much on the agenda for January. For Christmas my Nan has treated me to a new toy. The new sewing machine is still in its box but it’s brimming with potential. I can’t wait to get cracking with it... handmade presents galore for Christmas 2010.

So keeping these things in mind, I’m wondering what things I will learn and add to this list this time next year. But for now I sign off for my first evening of 2010, cuddled up on the sofa and drinking tea, and I wish everyone a Happy New Year.

Em x